I woke up still dazed in the white hospital room. I was alone. My memory was hazy from the drugs, I couldn't remember my thoughts from before. It made my mind feel blank and puzzled. Somehow I had a lingering feeling from a wish or a need that I had before I fell asleep. Like when you walk into a room and forget what you needed, that lingering feeling that something was needed, yet I can't remember what.
Still blurred I closed my eyes to relax my mind, using energy on processing the images from vision was exhausting. How I felt like an old lady ready to bite the dust. The door opened to my room, yet I was too exhausted to open my eyes. The sounds of step was recognizable, my mothers way to walk had given her away. Then I heard another pair of steps. Steps I didn't recognize. The voices where low, but just loud enough to make words out of them.
"Let's talk in here" my mother said in a serious tone.
No answer, I guessed the other party would have nodded.
"You can't tell Haruka about your childhood together. I'm afraid it will trigger more seizures, and to be honest I'm not sure how much more her mind can take. At this point I'm ready to have her home schooled again"
Home schooled? She would take me out of school?
all through middle school I would have had been home taught every subjects needed to enter a high school. I would had been taught social skills, and proper etiquette, all the small things that I had forgotten I would have had relearned. I had been living like a wild child, adopted by foreign people.
I refused to spend another three years indoor far away from everything. I had finally made friends, all by myself. On this short week that I had been living high school life, taught myself social interaction, gone through conversation that nothing but the real deal could teach me. I had discovered so much on my own. I will protest against it with my life.
"But I know Haruka would refuse to do so, and honestly I want her to be able to function like a normal teenager. Which is why I would have to ask to either stay away from her, or to treat her as a new friend. The Haruka that you used to know is gone. You have to look at her as if you just met a stranger."
I realized know whom she was talking to. I imagined Kaoru standing in front of her, taking in all this. I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. He must feel awful, knowing that I'm no longer a childhood friend but a stranger. It hurted be deeply that there was no other way, but I agreed with my mother on this one... He would have to get to know me as a new person.
"I understand Tsukino-san. Seeing her like this gave me a scare. I don't want her to remember something that cause this much pain. Her biological parent's wouldn't want that for her either. Considered what brutal incident they went through, I want their daughter to at least be able to forget"
I couldn't help but feel I should't have heard that. Brutal incident? Like a horrible accident? Though I wished that was the truth, something within me stirred up. I felt as if it was something far worse than anything I could imagine. My mind was conflicted, with feeling of wanting to know and the fear of knowing.
I decided that I couldn't leave it be just yet.
To have such an amazing childhood friend whom valued my parents, it could only mean that they had been good parents. That i shouldn't fear any bad childhood.
I realized my parents must have been nice people. People whom only deserved to be remembered. I have made up my mind.
I want to know the truth.
Ingen kommentarer:
Send en kommentar